Friday 21 September 2007

Jeremiah 29:11

I alone know the plans
I have for you,
plans to bring you prosperity
and not disaster,
plans to bring about
the future you hope for.

Then you will call to me.

You will come
and pray to me,
and I will answer you.

You will seek me,
and you will find me
because you will seek me
with all your heart.
So I got the day off today. Ruby wanted to take some extra rest so Chuseok began for me last night ! I headed down town to meet Jolie and Kara for dinner and coffee (and shopping :( lol )I heard that Chuseok was bigger than Christmas but Im not so sure... I do know though that Ive got another five days left of no work so Im happy with that!

Me Jackie and Cara are heading down to Jeongju early tomorrow to get our last hiking trip in together. With all the working out and dance classes Ive had this week Im pretty tired but know that as soon as I start hiking up that mountain tomorrow the adrenaline'll kick in and Ill be dandy. Jackies planning on hiking for five days but I've got so many goodbyes to do over the next few weeks that I might head on back on Tuesday or Wednesday and hang out with people back here in Cheonan. I think the plan is - Jeongju-Moaksan P.Prk-Maisan P.Prk- Deogyusan N.Prk (plan is we'll stay in a hyangjeokbong on top of the mountain )- Daedunsan P.Prk.

(I definately wont be sleeping on a pagoda in the terrential rain wrapped in a throw this time)

The clock is tick tocking away and every day it seems Im reminded that its almost time to say goodbye :) Im really happy though, in fact Im ecstatically happy and nervous and tons of other emotions I wont bore you all with! Sunny and Ruby ushered me over to the hagwon p.c in work on Wednesday afternoon with a slight sense of excitement and urgency... I think they've got something up their sleeves. They were asking me to pick out a hanbok (a traditional Korean dress) from a multitude of them online. (To be blatant I think they look ridiculous on Western women. They look lovely on Korean women with their delicate little frames but on Western women.. even smaller ones, I think they can scream out 'wannabe korean' I hate it lol) Ill keep you posted with what they're planning though!

I told some of my kids this week that its nearly time for saengsengnim choann to go back home and some of my li'll babies have been upset, others (my junior boys) have been like... yay teacher.. party, we party! (little trolls) lol

It hit me on Tuesday of this week after I had a rather miserable morning of being preached at by the church of God for about an hour and a half (yes.. really, not fun I tell thee) that I really am going home. Terry and Ruby showed me a picture of the new girl who theyve chosen to take my place. Take my placelol its sounds so awful ! Im really glad they've found someone though even thoug I know deep down shes not really 'taking my place' like that. Shes going to be moving in with me for about three days before I leave and Im happy that Ill be able to shown her round, help her out with stuff she needs and introduce her to all my mates. Im excited for her coz I didnt have any real English speaking mates for a while really! I hope shes nice.. eeerrrr ...just hope she likes people/ is sociable coz theres probably gonna be a few parties at mine before I leave hehe.

So my last hiking trip with the gals is gonna be great but sad too :) Im looking forward to getting out into the open and getting up those mountains! It could well be my very last chance.

Saturday 15 September 2007

For Paul

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same, 10

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back. 15

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. 20



Just a few recent snaps of Sojins dance academy and her gorgeous daughter. Ill undoubtedly put on some videos of us in motion with our gear on when I get them from Ellie (Sojins second daughter who took great pleasure of getting us on film last week through the glass doors :)




Another busy week's flown by... my pro belly dancing lessons are coming on a treat. Ive actually found something I LOVE and am good at ! Ive done lots of cardio, lots of yoga, teaching time with Cherry on Monday, jogs, meetings, dinner appointents. Its been another very active week. I found out my mate Robyn has started working out at my gym so its gonna be wicked to have a running partner to motiate me some more. By Friday aft I was done teaching. Ruby cancelled my last lesson coz the kids were knackered bless 'em. This week has been yet another for getting closer to Sujan and Wendy. It seems that the more their English improves (which is EVERY DAY at the moment)the closer we become and we were close when Sujan could barely say hello, how are you ? I LOVE those little girls so much.

Ive really had the best day today. God has blessed me so much with my two mates Isabel and Juri. Theyre like my guardian angels sat the moment and I see them both at least twice a week now. I always feel a little back to myself when Ive spent time with them. I cant explain it. I guess its coz theyre a little like my mates back at home but Christian.

Today was time for me to go offer my services at the single mums home (Ive wanted to go along with Isabel for so long but Ive always been away when she been).It was SO lovely. I was a little worried that the Mums'd wonder why a dodgy, blonde foreigner was coming into their home to help clean and look after their babies, I was worried there'd be tension there of not only a stranger being in their private home but a foreigner lol. I shouldnt have worried though at all. I felt so comfortable there with Isabel knowing the Mums and babies so I felt so relaxed and at home. The babies jaws dropped instantly (whats new there then lol) and one of the tiny babies just stared into my eyes in awe for about ten minutes and almost couldnt catch her breath properly which was the funniest thing Ive ever seen but I felt like crying for her at the same time coz you could tell she was really overwhelmed ! It seemed she was struggling to catch her breath and she didnt know whether to laugh or cry. It was so sweet.

Twenty minutes later her Mum passed her to me and she was happy gurgling on my arm all afternoon. She even fell asleep on my shoulder really snuggled up tight so I cant be that ugly afterall ha. I literally melted when her Mum passed her to me... I hope Im not ready for kids yet. The hagwon's enough to put me off for life.Its been reconfirmed for me here how hard and demanding kids actually are. They are for life.

When I was younger Mum did alot of nannying for kids after Dad left. I saw the poo wiped on our bathroom walls (Much to Mums sheer delight...Peter heehee), the cronic nose picking and bleeding noses over our cream carpets...(Sam) the constant whinging and crying (I better not mention lol)the green bogie wiping down the chair arm (my dear sister), the burst bean bags...up our noses on the ceilings, down the stairs, down our pyjamas// (that was me and my first boyfriend Christian age 3?) So, I always knew the hard work and stress. If you want your kids to be put off teeenage pregnancies/ sex at an early age/sex before marriage a little- do some nannying.

Ive been feeling really maternal today though and its been so nice playing with the two baby girls and having some cuddles. God's always supplied when Ive felt the need for a snuggle. Usually its been Sujan or Wendy but today it was two little bundles of joy :)

So after we ate together and played some more me Isabel and Juri went off to Pinacle Land overlooking the ocean. Considering the weathers been diabolical all week it stayed dry for us and we walked around the flower and herb gardens and sat by the waterfall for a while.

It reminded me today that this whole year has been a time to just sit with God. It reminded me today just listening to the water. It was so relaxing we ended up sititng there for a while watching the Korean families and children almost head butting eachother head first into the pools of shallow, fish filled water. Isabel treated us to dinner and we ate some beautiful food overlooking the huge grassy lawns and pretty flowers. I feel refreshed all over again. After Church tommorrow and my weekly sauna Ill be totally ready for another hectic week. My Korean mate has sorted me out a friend to help me with driving/ basic maneouvers so Im realy excited about that for this week! I wanna get on the road asap when I get home ! No more shite waiting for the buses for me ta. Ive done it all my life and just coz Ive travelled alot doesnt mean Im not gonna get on it quickly when I get home lol!

You know sometimes Ill sit with God or alone and think about my time here over the past year. I needed to come out here and God made me pursue it. This very place. He planned everything here for me from the place to the people. I really believe it. He put it on my heart like I believe he does with a lot of things. Some people refused to believe it was from God but to this day I believe Im supposed to be here. In this place at this time with these lovely people.

Ill think about how Ive spent my time here and what Id do if I was doing it all over again. The truth is that Id change nothing. Ive been everywhere I wanted to go. Ive done everything Ive needed to do. I sometimes think about things Ive 'missed out' on like big clubbing nights out in Seoul with mates here, drinking sessions down town most nights that Ive missed. What I feel though is that I havent 'missed out' on it.

I came here to rest my soul, to think about my life, to spend time with God, for him to draw me close to him and its been one of the most peaceful, interesting years of my life. Actually THE most peaceful year of my life. I know when I get home everything is going to be mad again but Ill know and always remember the year that God himself took me away from everything to love his daughter and hold her in the palm of his very hand.

Ill never forget the moments Ive had with him here.

I doubt that this blog wil get any better with my hectic schedule up to when I leave but Il post my pictures (if I have any time to take any haha). Until then.

Sunday 9 September 2007

Im so close to ending this blog right now coz Ive been so busy and updating it is becoming a chore lol. I cant possibly write about everything I do on here coz I just dont have the time and facebook seems to be so much easier for connecting with peeps. I m having issues with being sucked into the world of facebook and web sites such as bebo and my space. I've a strong theory about this time we're living in and Ive been so tempted to just cut off my accounts lol ! Ive got so many issues with facebook but I know if I cut myself off from it Ill also cut off alot of contacts off that I wanna stay in touch with. I know theres always email but facebook seems to be so much easier. I have a list growing in my head of the positives and the negatives of being on there ! Arrrggghh.. Ill keep you posted on it. This blog will definately stop in a few weeks coz Ill be home wit you all and we can TALK !!!!!!!!!

The weeks seem to be flying by... Its as though Im savouring every moment in my hagwon, every sunset I see, every time I bump into that lovely little old lady downstairs (who had her hair done last week and had her pearls on), everytime one of my kids comes over and throws their arms around me.

I sometimes feel like I should be distancing myself now from peeps but I seem to be revelling even more in the love my kiddies give me, relishing in the hugs Sujan and Wendy pour out. When I have a blue day its like the kids just know and like they just automatically know to love me more on those days.I never let them know Im feeling blue (if I am ) but its like they just know :) A few weeks ago (I dont know if Ive already posted this but..) I had a really bad week after something happened and I was feeling so down. I went and sat on the toilet (seat down.. sounds dirty but its my escape place sometimes when theres no where else to escape to in my busy hagwon) and prayed that God would remind me how much he Loved me. I instantly felt as though God just said, Scott, Ok Scott'll show you today. Just you wait. I felt as though the voice in y head was that clear that I was actualy saying the words myself and felt stupid. An hour or so later though Scott waddels in in his cute little shoes and hands me this beautiful hand crafted mirror, his face lighting up when he saw the expression on my face. It seems he never stops using these kids to remind me how much he adores me. It was a really memorable moment for me. Ill never forget it.

On Thursday Wendy sat and picked her nose for 45 minutes, Scott kept going out of the room for water every 5 mintues (coz he gets bored of the girlie singing & dancing being the only boy in the group) and Sujan sat with a face on because her best friend Melanie was sick and she was scared of getting told off by her Dad for being lost that afternoon but as I looked out into my little classroom I couldnt help but giggle to myself and wonder how Im ever gonna say bye to these little darlings. Ive seen most of them (Sujan and Wendy for definate) five days a week every week for almost a whole year. I feel like their main caregiver sometimes and I Love them.

Mrs Nam is unfortunately in hospital and Ive been worried alot this week. She had a car accident last week and since then shes not been back into work.Please pray for her. She had a CAT scan done and I everyones a little worried about her. Its not the same with her not there pottering around. I dont like it !

Anyway, moving on before the tears start again haha. Ive had a good week Ive hung out with mates alot, done alot of exercise, went to my belly dancing lesson on Wednesday which was great. I really feel like Ive found something Im good at and am gonna try carry on with it when I get home. My mate Cherry came round on Monday so I could help her with her university studies which will be an ongoing thing till I leave now . Althoug its a favour Im ding for her and her Mum Its actually really great for me too coz Im reminded how much I really learnt when I did my degree and things are coming to the surface that I forgot I knew! I really enjoy teaching one-to-ones. Willian my other student cancelled all his privates with me last week coz he was on business again so despite the dissapointment of not getting extra in my pay packet I had two nights free last week so I hit the gym :)

So, I went running last week, did three sessions of Yoga, had a good power walk with Monica, did an hour and a half of belly dancing and a small workout at the dance academy but still it doesnt feel like Im doing enough. Im craving more.. its driving me mad. Saturday I had to take a trip down to Yongsan for a hard drive.. my computers finally not switching its poor self off now due to info overload lol. I cant believe how many pictures Ive got after this year. Ive gotta stop. Seriously lol!

The next few weeks will fly by too. Ive got Chuseok coming up in a fortnight and plan to go on a last girlie hiking trip for a couple of days with Bolen, Carabeara and Monica. Im looking forward to having as much exercise as I want and having a whole 5 days off work yay ! Two weeks after that my Korean Family are taking me away with them (I guess if all well with Mrs Nam) to a resort for the weekend with Sujan and Wendy of course. They've even said I can bring Cara so I think It'll be a really nice, fun (but rather teary)last weekend together before I say farewell.

Ive got a lot to do this week. Running and a belly dancing session tommorrow morning, a one to one with Cherry in the evening, coffee with my pregnant mate Kyungran on Tuesday then a one to one with William in the evening, Wednesday I have my compassionte ministries meeting and then a yoga and cardio session, Thursday jog and William till 9.30, Friday ..hopefully a morning in bed so I can have a lie in ! This is an average week here for a Cheonanite I guess.Its busy, busy, busy and I feel terrible that I havent been to the orphanage for weeks so next week its gonna have to be priority..or maybe I could go this Friday morning...

Im currently putting up all my things for sale that Ive spent a fortune on in my apt. My sofa, queenie, bookshelves, chests of drawers.. stuff like that. Its all rather surreal. In a way it felt like yesterday that I was viewing thing to buy!

Had Monica over for the weekend which has been nice, red wine, a good laugh. I went out for a lovely italian with the girls today from my church, Sarah (my pastors wife ) and her cute daughter Emma. We sat out in the heat of the sun for quite a while on the patio and then me and some mates went on to Independance Hall. Im not big on museums and get bored after ten minutes but I loved the grounds! The torture chamber info in there was really interesting but so graphic I lasted about two minutes and was out with a definate tear in my eye. These Koreans had it tough thats all I can say.

So, Im busy and have a lot going on as per yooge as we say in Manchester :) Got a lot to think and pray about over the next few weeks but for now Im not making any strenuous decisions about what next. Im just gonna go home, chill out and think and prayabout my options when Im ready. I have a few ideas and all these desires to do certain things right now but one thing Ive learnt here is that its not about what I want for my life ... its about what God wants.

So please pray for me that Ill hear his voice clearly in all this madness...in all these ideas and options that are laden before me. Because I know there are soooo many.

Sunday 2 September 2007






Okay okay ! So im doing a duff job again with this blog and thinking about sacking it off coz of lack of time.

Its hit me the past few days how soon Im leaving here and although Ive been given good advice to prepare my heart and cut down on seeing aquaintances where relationships could grow stronger I seem to be aquiring new relationships and spending more time with peeps lol.Just me all over.

Anyway the weeks are flying by. My belly dancing lessons are going well and are sooo fun, Im upping the ante on my cardio for a change (now the humidity is rapidly dissipating- oh the relief of not being wet through and saturated in your own and everyone elses sweat all the time lol ), keeping busy with my kiddies, odd yoga seshes (in my rather growing pretentious gym)and keeping up to date with mates.

Last week at work was a walk in the park. So much so my head was buzzing with the thoughts of going home. I worked about 21 hours.. honestly and to make matters more intense William (who i teach twice a week) was too busy for privates this week. It was not enough! How peeps do it everyweek.. i dunno ! I went crazy, my head was spinning all week with excitement, all that time free gave me all these eratic thoughts of home and Christmas and I was so restless sat there with no one to teach lol and all these thoughts of Christmas eve candle night ceremonies at Mottram on the Hill and our church, walks in the snow up at Warhill, our annual Christmas Morning breakfasts of champagne with the Martins (before church lol), christmas shopping with Mum... My girls, getting ready to go out on nights out over the festive season, nites in with Sarah drinking the left over brandy/vodka/ baileys and watching good old british comedy in front of the fire nearly weeing ourselves taking off the likes of Dawn French doing some Christmas special... arrgghhh the list is endless.... nothing beats being a Bunyan at Christmas :)

Despite my week being a 21 hour one Ive been kept busy out of the hagwon. My mate Cherry is struggling with her literature shes been given in Uni to review so Ive been making notes for her this week, read the book she needed to read and plan to meet up with her a few hours a week to help her out. Not only is it helping her but its keeping something alive in me that I love about literature and its reminding me about everything I learnt on my uni course so its all good :) Me and Rhys met up on Thursday for a bite and the evil makoli. I needed a guy chat. We drunk as much as we could and left the bar but as we were leaving something peculiar came over me, I was like you do know weve got half a teapot of makoli left. what are we doing leaving it ? so in two seconds we were back in the bar sat drinking the stuff and then next morning well... all I can say is if youve tried makoli you know how the head hurts the next day. Unluckily for me one of my fave students who I obsess about on here (Tonie) got out his little violin and started to play me a tune.

Jenny, my mate from college and uni came up this weekend from her little place near Suwon. It was SO mint to have her here and to catch up about the old days in college, have a giggle, talk about old people we used to hang out with together! We met up with Arran in town, went for an outback and then on to the extremely cool Rolling Stones Bar, Red Rooster and the evil makoli bar for another teapot of delight and some Man U action. The rain was pouring, Jen was with me in Korea talking about old times, listening to Fleetwood mac, the Beatles and getting wild watching the footy. Im getting ready for home :)